Speculative Classification of Ferrotopic plumbicitis — Dr. Semper Augustus; 0.000008 Ma; 44°25′57″N 26°6′14″E.

Ferrotopic plumbicitus presents volatile parasitic-topology; posing a significant threat to the integrity of water delivery infrastructures. The propagation of ferro-morphic parasites through manifold networks was first discovered in Bucharest, Romania in June of 2014, by researchers at the Flemish Institute of Synthetic Botany. The organism engages in an oxidation reaction that replaces crystalline martensite with cellulose tissue. The novel cellulose tissue exhibits mimetic morphology; taking on physical characteristics of nearby flora. This discovery led to the formation of the European Alliance for the Research and Eradication of Self Propagating Bio-synthetic Networks.

To date, it is believed that the self aggregating system was inoculated via insect vector. Anthidium cingulatum is a solitary bee of the family Megachilidae; endemic to central and eastern europe, northern africa, and the middle east. This species utilizes masonry construction techniques, reinforcing collected mud with fibers gathered from plants, and occupies small gaps in walls. In 2002 a specimen was collected by Dr. Semper Augustus in the crimean peninsula. Curiously the solitary bee was engaging in networked behavior.

Agustus noted in a field journal:

“I happened upon the creature, writhing in a contorted dance on a windowsill in an internet cafe. At first I thought the poor creature was in the throes of death, its body contorting in a strange dance atypical for a solitary mason bee. Colony species exhibit this sort of behavior to communicate to their peers. I was amused at the thought that in this remote village with a severed network connection that this solitary bee was engaging in networked behavior. On closer inspection I noticed that in the thorax joints small fungus had overtaken the bee. I was not familiar with any species of cordyceps which plagued this species. I was immediately excited at the prospect of discovering an emergent parasite on the very bee that pollinated the orchid which I was surveying. With sweaty fingers I fumbled for a specimen bag and gently maneuvered the insect into its plastic chamber. I said a silent goodbye to the creature which surely would not survive long in captivity, and placed the bag in my satchel.

On my return to the lab I used a contouring laser to conduct a postexhoumous thoraxial scan of the bee. The infesting parasite exhibited a pileate basidiocarp, dihyphal systems, and a hymenium without hymenial cystidia. This is typical morphology of the genus Trametes. To our surprise, when we captured spores for analysis, we discovered The spores were smooth, hyaline, long-filiform, and septate. This is atypical for the spores of Trametes, which has rough non-dextrinoid spores. Instead we were looking at the entomopathogenic spores of the Cordycipitaceae family. Parasites of this sort reproduce in cell tissue of infected hosts, and interfere with nervous system responses.”

The affected subject experiences severe sensations of anemic dehydration driven by the fungal manipulation of the nervous system. As a result, the afflicted insect seeks sources of water high in iron. In many cases this leads to the introduction of parasitic litho-spores into municipal water networks made of iron pipe.

From this introduction, the aerobic fungus propagates rapidly due to the high concentration of oxygen bound in face centered-cubic molecules of Iron (III) Oxide (Fe3O4). The subsequent replacement reaction forms. The energized spore radicals next dissociate the hexagonal allotropes of graphite that make up 9.6-15.4% the mass of Cast iron. The honeycomb lattice of crystalline iron is disrupted along heterogenous grain boundaries, and the peripheral carbon molecules are sequestered.

Water and carbon dioxide combine to form carbonic acid (H2CO3), a weak acid that breaks into hydrogen ions (H+) and bicarbonate ions (HCO3-). The radical hydrogen ion released in this process is re-synthesized by parasito-electrolysis with the excess carbon from decomposing graphite armatures and the oxygen stored in fungal cavities to form novel cellulose molecules (C6H10O5).

The Amorphic Polysaccharide chains of cellulose exhibit a higher organizational potential than native graphene and rapidly replace the crystalline molecules with organic cellular tissue. Curiously, the cellular growths exhibit mimetic reproduction; taking on physical characteristics of nearby flora. The resultant flora assembles itself from genetic memory, manifesting itself in hierarchical branching structures. These branching structures experience an inverted growth pattern. While the arms of the branding structures carry upward, new scion growths project downward, toward the source groundwater of their origins.

The potential of Ferrotopic plumbicitis to disrupt the manifold integrity of water delivery infrastructures poses a severe risk for the populations that rely on these networks for the delivery of fresh water. Structural concerns of this nature have the potential to stress municipalities to the brink of collapse.

Speculative Classification of Ferrotopic plumbicitis — Dr. Semper Augustus; 0.000008 Ma; 44°25′57″N 26°6′14″E.

©-0.0001 Ma, FISB.

︎Prev                                        Next︎